Thanksgiving 2013

Thanksgiving 2013 was another wonderful California trip for the Hess Family.  After hosting a shower for Kaylee Lyman on Saturday morning we hopped in the car and headed to St. George.  We had a chance to go to dinner with Grandma and Grandpa Adams and visit for a while.

Then we headed to Las Vegas for a night with the Cottles -- love being able to visit so many family members on our road trips.

Sunday after church we headed to California to spend some time at Ray & Cathy's.  Lots of food, games and being spoiled.  

Monday:  Perfect beach day ever!!!!  (Separate blog about that)

Dinner with Ray & Cathy at a super fun restaurant.

Tuesday:  Six Flag/Magic Mountain.  Holy Moly!  Serious roller coasters there.  Superman and the Full Throttle about killed me.  Cam cried while waiting in line and then loved the world's fastest and biggest loop roller coaster.

Wednesday:  Universal Studios with Russ & Kate.  Another perfect day!  No crowds.  The kids did all of the rides over and over and over.  We loved the tours and all of the characters to do pictures with.  

Thursday:  Ray & Cathy headed to Boise, so Russ & Jenny and kids came over for a yummy Thanksgiving dinner.  With Russ & Dave cooking you know it is going to be delicious!!!  Despite a clogged sink and some laughs it was perfect.  Cam did his 2nd annual polar bear plunge (one time with Kate's help) and we played football, went to the park and ate and ate.  And then headed to San Diego.

Friday:  Lauren soccer and the kids and I Lego Land.  Cam and Ken had fun and we loved again not having crowds.  We had a great time Friday night at Old Town doing the Mormon Battalion tour and seeing information about Grandpa Bevan.  And of course dinner in Old Town was yummy!

Saturday:  Lauren soccer and Dave and Cam and Kenzi and I enjoyed La Jolla.  I never tire of the sea lions and the tide pools. 

Sunday:  Easy ride home with a quick stop and Grandma and Grandpas.

Thanks to Ray and Cathy for free tickets to everything -- Cottles, Jones and Grandma and Grandpa -- despite Lauren's team playing horrible -- we had another fabulous Thanksgiving trip!

Holiday Weekend

Lauren, Dave and Cameron headed to a soccer tournament on Friday and had a lovely warm time in sunny Las Vegas -- playing in the sun, enjoying soccer and having a great time with the Cottles.  Kenzi was in a play and didn't want to miss her last 3 performances so Kenzi and I had a girls' weekend at home.

We saw a play, starting reorganizing rooms, watched movies, slept in and then headed to the cabin Sunday after church.  Lorie, Kelli, Brennan and some of Kenzi's friends and I enjoyed dinner, playing lots of games, laughing, a little football and a few hours of fun in the snow and sun.  (Will we ever get tired of the cabin sledding up and down the hill!??!) And had a great time just jumping and playing in the snow.   With about 30 pictures trying to jump in the air!!

It was beatiful, warm, gorgeous clean air... wish we could have stayed another night. 

Love this Picture!

Dave and the person I will call once a month if Dave ever dies to help me not miss talking to him so much!

Trying to live life without worry of cancer.

Overall (once I got over my freaking out/depression after finishing chemo) I think that I've done pretty well emotionally.  

But I have to admit it is hard, very hard to not worry.  I always go back to the saying "With cancer time is like a present that is spoiled with the uncertainty of the future." 

I'm so grateful to feel good, to be living life mostly normal again and to be just about to hit my 2 year mark since diagnosis.  My biggest challenge is not worrying about the future.

For the past two months I've had some hip and bone pain and it has been getting a little worse. Unfortunately one of my mom's recurrences started that way.  So of course my mind immediately went there.  And then I hear about 2 ladies who had recurrences that were caught with hip pain.  So I've been trying not to worry.  But the longer it goes on the more I worry.

And in the meantime found out another friend is not doing to great.  They've started her on a new chemo that is intended to help maintain "quality of life.'' No words about getting her in remission.

I saw the PA for my regular check-up last week and she said although it was likely not cancer related I could do a scan if I wanted.  I don't want to panic and run to scans for every pain, but I couldn't shake the worry. So I moved up my blood test and had it yesterday.

And the news.... 7!  7!  7!  In October it was 8!

So although they can never 100% rule out a recurrence, it is likely not related at all!

Tears..... relief.....

I just wish I could just not worry.

On a side note that ties into this I was at a viewing on Monday night.  A sweet person came up to me and said "I saw you the other day and got in my prayer and said a silent prayer.  I am so grateful you are doing so well.  It could have been you we were here for tonight."

I get her comment was not meant as anything but a faithful comment.  But given the fact I was worried about it anyway it took all I could do not to cry.  

So for now I am grateful for a low CA 125. And am going to try so hard not to worry!  But that knowledge that it could be around the corner does help me appreciate life.  I'm going to try to keep so busy living and loving life that the fear can't creep in... and if it does it will only lead to gratitude!!!

How cool is Grandpa?!

A cousin sleepover at Grandpa's ... with a midnight run to Village Inn.

There are so many times when I miss my mom.  I miss her for me.  And I miss her for my kids. They would have loved her!  But when I see pictures like this I am reminded that my kids were blessed with an extra special Grandpa.

A few days before Christmas they had a sleepover at Grandpas and took a midnight run to Village Inn for dinner.  I think most of the girls were in jammies.  The kids had a great time and are so lucky to have their "wild and crazy 86-year old" Grandpa!

Happy 2014! This was supposed to be the year of health!

Ok... so soccer didn't go so well this afternoon.  Lauren ended up with a concussion and a quick trip to the ER to make sure everything is ok.

They think she is fine and will just have to follow regular concussion protocol for a while... but she has a MONSTER headache tonight.

I really was hoping 2014 would be the year of health at the Hess home.  Here's praying that Lolo's trip tonight was the highlight of the hospital year for us!

If we can laugh at it, we can live with it!

If we can laugh at it, we can live with it!

I heard this quote on a BYU Devotional today -- LOVE IT!!

I know I'm a bit morbid about my cancer and mortality, etc -- and I think at times it makes people uncomfortable.  They don't know how to react.

But this sums it up.  If I can laugh at it -- I can live with it!  I don't have a choice about what happens to me so if I can joke and laugh and accept it is easier.  It isn't dark, it isn't scary, it is just life.

I love that my kids joked about finding a new wife for Dave on ldssingles.com.  I love that Dave and the kids could make jokes about my bald head and my anorexic looking body when I was so sick.  I love that I can joke about whether or not I'll be around in 3 years.

This quote makes me feel better about our "sick" sense of humor!